Adoptions With Love Blog

Making an Adoption Plan for Your Second (or Third) Child

Making an adoption plan is a complicated decision. However, if you are not in the position to parent a child (or a second child), it can be a very positive choice for your family. Choosing adoption enables you to provide your baby with a supportive, loving, and secure home. If you are not able to parent another child right now, due to challenging circumstances at home, you may be considering making an adoption plan. Perhaps you have made an adoption plan before, and are now considering this path for a second time. You are not alone.

Many women who come to Adoptions With Love have faced multiple unplanned pregnancies. They love their children and put their children’s best interests first, by choosing adoption. Adoption has many benefits for children and can give families peace of mind.

If you are facing a second unplanned pregnancy, you have already faced some hard decisions in your life. Perhaps you made an adoption plan for your first baby. You may have chosen to raise your child (or children) on your own. No matter where you are in life, whether you are a single person or you are a single parent, adoption is still an option for you.

Facing a second (or third) unplanned pregnancy can bring a mix of emotions. You may feel shocked, frustrated, and depressed. Just know that whatever you are feeling, you are right in feeling this way. It is common for expectant/birth mothers to experience a range of emotions surrounding an unexpected pregnancy. You may be feeling let down, embarrassed, and angry by your circumstances. This was certainly not your plan. You may be wondering, ‘How could this be happening to me again?’ Life can feel incredibly unfair when faced with this type of situation, but it is not uncommon. In fact, more than half of pregnancies in the U.S. are found to be unplanned.

If this is your second (or third, fourth, or fifth) pregnancy and you are considering making an adoption plan for your child, read on. Here, we will share advice for how to make a plan that works for you and your family.

First Adoption Plan, Second Baby

If you have faced an unplanned pregnancy in the past, you already know how overwhelming it can be. You were not planning to be in this situation the first time around, but you felt that parenthood was the best possible path. You may have struggled – financially, emotionally, mentally, or even physically – and now feel that having another child would be too much.

There are many reasons to consider an adoption plan for a second child, including:

  • You are already facing financial hardship
  • Your child (or children) require your full attention
  • Your job demands your time and focus
  • You simply do not want any more children
  • You are not in a safe or stable situation to raise another child

If you are already parenting a child (or children) then you understand how much time, energy, patience, and money is required with child-rearing. The U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA) finds the average cost of raising one child from birth to age 18 is about $233,610. Children, as you know, require round-the-clock care. Sometimes, the work involved is just too much, especially for families already feeling the strain of their current circumstances.

If you are considering placing a child for adoption, you are thinking like a loving and selfless parent. You want the best for this child. You want your child to be raised in a safe, stable, and loving home. You want your child to have opportunities and great experiences throughout childhood. These are all positive reasons to consider adoption.

If you have children old enough to understand the situation, you will want to discuss the adoptions process with them. Talking to your children about the adoption plan can help them cope with the adoption, as well.  Your children can look through the adoptive family profiles with you. Talk to them about the type of adoption plan they envision for the baby.

At Adoptions With Love, adoption plans can be customized to your wants and needs. If you know that your children would like to see photos of the baby as he/she grows, you may request photo updates via email or via your adoption agency. If you want to get to know the baby’s adoptive family personally, you can arrange phone call updates from time to time. The frequency of communication is in your hands, and your adoption specialist can help you create an adoption plan that works for you, your children, and your child’s adoptive family.

Second Adoption Plan

If you are facing a second unplanned pregnancy, and you have made an adoption plan in the past, then you know what to expect. It may not be easier, but you already know what the journey will bring, and you understand the many challenges and joys you will experience with adoption.

If you have already placed a child with adoption in the past, and you have used a reputable, experienced adoption agency, then you can call them to start your adoption journey again. You may want to consider placing your children with the same family. A private, domestic, full-service adoption agency like Adoptions With Love will walk you through this adoption process every step of the way, offering you love, support, knowledge, and assistance to ensure you are treated with respect and understanding.

Support for a Bright Future Ahead

Whether you have placed a child for adoption previously, or you are parenting a child and considering adoption for your second, you should feel confident in your decision. Placing a child for adoption is never an easy experience, no matter if it is your first or fifth child. A loving adoption agency, however, can make sure you feel supported along the way.

When you choose to work with an adoption agency like Adoptions With Love, you will never be pressured to make a decision with which you are uncomfortable. You will never face judgment, criticism, or bias. Only you can make this decision – and it is one that you will make for yourself, your baby, and – if you have children at home – your family.

If you are considering adoption and would like to learn more about the services available at Adoptions With Love, call us any time of day, any day of the week at 800-722-7731, text us confidentially at 617-777-0072, or contact us online. You can also learn more about placing a second (or third) child for adoption by downloading our new eBook below.