Adoptions With Love Blog

I Just Gave Birth: Is It Too Late to Put My Child Up for Adoption?

Facing an unplanned pregnancy can feel like a complete crisis. It can be confusing, overwhelming, and shocking for many women – particularly those who did not know they were pregnant for several months. This is not uncommon. As a result, many women do not know what to do when they discover they are pregnant, and do not always make a decision prior to giving birth.

If you are nearing the end of your pregnancy or have just given birth, you may feel pressured to make a fast decision for your baby. You may not feel ready to raise a child and panicked at the thought of what to do next. You may be considering a safe haven where you can leave your baby. Or you may be seeking a family to adopt your child. This begs the question, “Can you give your baby up for adoption after it is born?”  Yes, read more here.

Whether you are in your third trimester or have already given birth, it is not too late to make an adoption plan for your baby. In fact, placing your baby for adoption is one of the best and most loving things you can do right now, if you are not ready to become a parent.

Sadly, there have been news stories of women abandoning their babies. They, too, felt like they were in a crisis and unsure what to do. Unfortunately, they did not know that adoption was an option for them—and made  last-minute decisions that brought terrible consequences. In January 2022, for example, a teen mom in New Mexico made headlines when she was charged with attempted murder and felony child abuse for throwing her new born son into a dumpster. Alexis Avila said she was “panicked and did not know what to do or who to call” when she gave birth, just one day after learning she was pregnant. Her son was found wrapped in a towel and black plastic garbage bag inside the dumpster six hours after Alexis left him there. He was rushed to the hospital where doctors were able to treat him and keep him in stable condition. Alexis is currently 18 years old.

This scenario is rare, but it is an unfortunate reality. When an expectant/birth mother learns she is pregnant, she is flooded with a mix of emotions. Many young women panic, much like Alexis did, and feel like they have nowhere to turn. At Adoptions With Love, we want expectant/birth mothers to know that they always have a choice, and that it is never too late to place a baby for adoption. We are here for you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

What are Your Options for a Late Pregnancy or After Birth?

While it is a stressful situation to be in, facing an unplanned pregnancy does not have to result in a negative outcome. You can make a positive decision now – even if you have already given birth.

If you decide to parent your child, you will want to find support. Ask yourself if you have family members, or if the biological father, will help support you and your baby. Think about the future and how you might manage childcare. Look for support groups and women’s groups to help you along the way, as well.

Adoption is still an option for you after giving birth. You can make an adoption plan right from the hospital . You can also place your baby for adoption after you return home from the hospital. Or, if you need more time to make this decision and cannot care for the baby, an adoption agency can step in to help while you consider your options. You may feel pressured or rushed to make a decision, but know that you do have time. In fact, in every state, you cannot sign papers allowing an adoption until after the birth of the baby. This allows birth mothers time to meet the baby, explore all her options and make peace with their decision.

To make an adoption plan, or give your baby up for adoption after birth, you need to work with a licensed adoption agency. Adoptions With Love, can meet you to discuss your options, find care for your baby (if needed), and help you choose the perfect family to adopt and raise your child. Working with a licensed adoption agency is the best way to ensure your adoption is safe, legal, permanent, and in the best interests of you and your baby.

Adoption is a brave, selfless, and loving choice for a child. If you are not ready to parent your child, your adoption agency can help you find a family that is. There are many hopeful adoptive families longing to raise a child. The adoption process is safe and thorough. Your adoption agency will perform background checks and a home study to ensure the family can provide a safe, stable, and loving home for your child. This makes adoption a wonderful alternative to a baby safe haven. You can rest assured that your baby will be placed in loving arms. You can prevent your child from entering the foster care system. You can have peace of mind in knowing that your baby will grow up in a loving, permanent home, with a family who has always dreamed of raising a child. Adoption is an incredibly thoughtful, loving, and brave decision that will allow your child to thrive.

 

Making an Adoption Plan

Many women assume that adoption means “goodbye” forever. This is not always true. While adoption does provide a permanent home for a child (in which they will live with their forever family), you can still maintain contact with your child’s family, if you wish, through open adoption. This is entirely up to you.

Open adoption can mean something different for everyone, but to put it simply: Open adoption involves ongoing communication between birth parents and an adoptive family. Most adoptive families today maintain this ongoing, open communication with their child’s birth mother. Every single adoptive family at Adoptions With Love agrees to having at least a semi-open adoption, in which they send photos and letters for birth mothers regularly. Many birth mothers have peace of mind in seeing how their child is doing and growing over the years.

A part of open adoption means selecting the parent(s) who will raise your child. You can browse the profiles of families looking to adopt. You can speak with these prospective adoptive parents ahead of time, and you may even choose to meet with them in person, if you wish. With the help of your adoption professional, you can find the perfect family for your baby.

Closed adoption is also an option if you desire more privacy and anonymity. There is no right or wrong plan when it comes to adoption, as everyone is different. If you decide to have a closed adoption, Adoptions With Love will keep photos and updates on file in case you change your mind later, and decide you would like to have contact with your child’s adoptive family.

 

Support & Guidance Every Step of the Way

No matter if and when you choose to place your child for adoption, Adoptions With Love can help. Our caring staff offer support and guidance at any point, free of pressure or judgment, but full of compassion for you and your situation.. Birth mothers who choose to work with Adoptions With Love also enjoy many services free of charge, including:

  • Counseling (before and after adoption)
  • Legal services regarding the adoption
  • Designing an adoption plan that works for you
  • Financial assistance (including rent and other bills impacted by pregnancy and birth)
  • Medical assistance (including uninsured doctor visits and hospital stay)

These services are also confidential. No one has to know about your adoption plan. We respect the privacy of every birth/adoptive parent.

Remember: The choice is yours. There is no one path that is right for everyone. However, adoption is a very positive and accessible option for you. Expectant/birth mothers should never feel so alone and so desperate that they feel the need to throw a baby in a dumpster. The trauma from these circumstances can be avoided with the help of a reputable adoption agency that can offer professional support. For more information on your options, you can contact us. We can offer free and confidential advice.

 

If you are facing a crisis pregnancy or have just given birth, please do not hesitate to call us at 1-800-722-7731 or text us confidentially at 617-777-0072. We can speak with you, confidentially and free of charge, any time of day, any day of the week.

For more information about putting a baby up for adoption after birth, you may also download our free guide: A Guide to Adoption After Birth.

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