Adoptions With Love Blog

5 Considerations Before Choosing an Adoptive Family for Your Baby

Facing an unplanned pregnancy is one of the most difficult and emotional life events.  You may feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders, especially if you are trying to decide  to place your baby for adoption. Making an adoption plan for your child is a brave, loving, and selfless decision. It is also one that must be made by you.

You may not have planned this pregnancy, but you do have choices. While you may be feeling helpless and all alone, the truth is that about half of all pregnancies in the U.S. are unintended. Should you choose to place your child for adoption, you will have the power to choose your child’s adoptive family. You will also have the power to choose what type of adoption plan this will be. Do you want an open adoption, where you maintain on-going communication with the adoptive family? Are you looking for a fresh start, and wish to keep the adoption closed? These are all your choices.

Making these decisions are not easy, but they give you options with  this pregnancy. They give you a say in what happens to your child. With the help of a trustworthy adoption agency, you will find a safe, stable, and loving home for your baby. You will be able to ensure that this baby has wonderful parents and a happy life that is full of opportunity.

When reviewing the  profiles of families looking to adopt, you will want to take a few things into consideration. Read on, as we share 5 considerations before choosing the family for your child.

  1. What kind of childhood do you want for your child?

When you think about this future life for your child, what does it look like? Do you imagine him or her riding a bike in a suburban neighborhood? Do you see your child playing soccer at a private school? The way you envision your child’s upbringing can help you determine the type of adoptive parents you want her to have.

  1. Are the values and beliefs of the adoptive family important to me?

This is an important decision. The adoptive parents you choose will be caring for, loving, and raising your child. If you have strong religious beliefs, you may want to your child to be raised with the same ideology. You may feel strongly about a variety of political topics and have a strong desire for your child to be raised with similar beliefs. This is an  area that may help you decide which family is best  to parent your child.

  1. Should my child’s race and/or cultural identity match the adoptive family’s?

Race or ethnicity may be a factor in who you choose as your child’s adoptive parents. If you are a person of color, you may want your child to be raised by a person of color, as well. You may not care about the family’s ethnic background, but you want to be sure your child is raised with an awareness of his/her cultural background. You may want to make sure he/she is raised by parents who will take an interest, celebrate his/her roots and be sure to surround him/her with others of similar background. If this is something that is important to you, then you will want to find an adoptive family who can meet your needs.

  1. What else is important to me?

As you consider the type of childhood you would like your child to have and the other factors we covered, you will want to ask yourself: ‘What else is important to me?’ Do you have education goals for your child? Do you want your child to be raised in a two-parent household? What about the idea of a loving single mother raising the child? Do you want to make sure he grows up with a big extended family? Is it important that you feel a personal connection with the adoptive parents? Think about what is important to you and what you really want for your child’s future. Write  down your answers and review them with your adoption professional. This will help you decide on the perfect adoptive family for your baby.

  1. What is your gut telling you?

Adoption is an emotional decision. You are being driven by love, and your commitment to this child is evidenced by your research and considerations. At the end of the day, you need to make the decision with which you feel most comfortable. The same rule applies to choosing adoptive parents.  You are a mother. Mothers have those gut instincts for a reason. Only you know what is best for you and what – and who – is best for your child.  Most birthmothers report that they knew the minute they found the best family for their child.  With some help from your adoption agency, you can find the perfect parents to love and raise your baby.,  You should also listen to your gut and how you feel about potential adoptive parents.

If you would like help in making an adoption plan and finding adoptive parents for your child, reach out to Adoptions With Love any time. We are always here, day or night, to help guide you along in this process – and there are never any fees for birth mothers. Call us at 800-722-7731, text us confidentially 617-777-0072, or contact us online.

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