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If you are a teenager and facing an unplanned pregnancy, you likely feel overwhelmed. Becoming pregnant as a young woman can be very scary. You might feel nervous, alone, and unsure of what to do next. The first thing to know is that you are not alone. Teen pregnancy is actually very common. In the United States alone, there are over 550,000 teen pregnancies each year. About one in four women get pregnant before their 20th birthday. Most of these teen pregnancies (82 percent) are unplanned.
As you digest the news of your unplanned pregnancy, you probably have many questions. You may be wondering how this pregnancy will change your life, what your options are, and how you can break the news to your parents. Try not to worry – this pregnancy may change the course of your life, but you do have options if you are not ready to become a parent. Right now, it is important to find a professional – whether your doctor, a health clinic, or an adoption agency – who can discuss these with you.
As an adoption agency helping young women all over the U.S., Adoptions With Love has received many questions about teen pregnancy. We have helped many young women like you get these answers, learn about their options, and make loving decisions for their baby – some adoption, and some parenting. Below we have answered some common teen pregnancy questions for you.
9 Questions for Pregnant Teens, Answered
Many questions surrounding teen pregnancy surround abortion rights. Abortion access has changed quite a bit over the past several years. In 2022, when Roe v. Wade was reversed by the U.S. Supreme Court, many states changed their abortion laws. Some states had trigger bans in place, which took effect immediately following the collapse of the constitutional right to abortion care. Some states have codified abortion rights, meaning the right to an abortion is enshrined and protected in the state’s individual constitution. It is important to know the abortion laws of your state before making any decisions regarding pregnancy.
What are my pregnancy options?
As scary as this situation can be, it is important to remember that you have options. You can choose between adoption, parenthood, and termination. This decision is yours and yours alone to make. No one should pressure you or guilt you into anything with which you are not fully comfortable. However, it is important to talk with your doctor, to learn how to stay healthy during this pregnancy and beyond.
It may also be helpful to do some research and speak to other teens who have faced an unplanned pregnancy. An adoption agency may be able to connect you with these other women, as well as talk to you about your different choices (and the effects of each). Be sure to meet with an adoption agency that will not pressure you into a certain decision. Adoptions With Love, for example, will support and respect any choice you make.
What are the benefits of adoption for teens?
Approximately one-third of women facing an unplanned pregnancy considers and wants to learn more about adoption. While you may not have considered adoption before, know that there are many benefits for young women like you.
When an expectant/birth mother chooses to make adoption plan, she can:
- Continue on to pursue her own personal and professional goals, such as earning a degree
- Ensure her child will be placed in a safe, loving, and stable home full of opportunity
- Hand-select the adoptive parents to raise and love her child
- Custom design an open adoption plan to keep in touch with her child’s adoptive family for years to come
- Continually see her child grow over the years with updates through the open adoption or by photos sent to the adoption agency
- Get financial assistance with rent, prenatal care costs, maternity-related expenses, and more
Where can I go for help for my teen pregnancy??
There are many support groups, medical facilities, and adoption agencies that can help you through this emotional time in your life. First, it is important to talk to your doctor about how to take care of yourself – both mentally and physically – during your pregnancy. You may also find a local teen pregnancy support group to meet with other young women who are, or have been in, the same situation.
If you are considering making an adoption plan, you may also find a trustworthy adoption agency, such as Adoptions With Love. There you will find caring professionals who can offer you counseling and legal services – free of charge. Your adoption agency social worker will listen to you, walk you through the adoption process, and offer you support that is completely free of judgment or pressure.
Do I have to tell my parents?
If you are 18 years old, the simple answer to this question is no. You do not have to tell your parents about your pregnancy. For those who are under the age of 18 and living with your parents, you will find that sharing pregnancy news is necessary. If you do not feel that you can find support from your parents, you can turn to your adoption agency for emotional – and completely confidential – support. The staff at Adoptions With Love can also guide you through the process of sharing your pregnancy news with loved ones and, if necessary, serve as a mediator to facilitate difficult discussions. Some young mothers choose to keep their pregnancy and choices private and share the news after the birth. Read more about how to tell your parents here.
What should I do?
This is a common question that pregnant teens ask themselves. It is, however, a question that cannot be answered for you. Only you can decide what is best for your future and for the future of your baby. If you are struggling to make a decision, you should take some time to reflect on your options, discuss your choices and possible outcomes with a professional counselor. A supportive and caring adoption professional can help you work through your emotions to decide what you really want and which path is best for you.
How do I keep myself healthy during pregnancy?
The first – and most important – thing to do is to visit a doctor or midwife. Keeping up with regular prenatal care appointments is critical for your health and the health of your baby. Your doctor or midwife will also prescribe or recommend a prenatal vitamin and will typically recommend getting plenty of rest and eating a balanced diet involving fruits, vegetables, protein, and healthy grains. Your doctor can advise you on fitness and the best ways to keep active during pregnancy.
What are some of the risks faced by pregnant teens?
According to the World Health Organization (WHO), “Adolescent mothers (aged 10–19 years) face higher risks of eclampsia, puerperal endometritis and systemic infections than women aged 20–24 years, and babies of adolescent mothers face higher risks of low birth weight, preterm birth and severe neonatal condition.”
What is it like to be a teenage mother?
Becoming a parent as a teenager can be a difficult experience. There are many opinion articles across the internet about the difficulties of raising a child as an adolescent. These experiences may not be yours, exactly, as everyone experiences life differently, but many teen parents agree that it is a stressful and lonely situation. Many teen moms share that they are changing diapers and struggling to get their baby to sleep while their friends are going out and having fun, touring colleges and traveling to other states and countries. For real insight into what it is like to be a teenage mother, it is best to join a Facebook group or in-person club in your community.
Can I go to school during pregnancy?
Yes, you can attend school throughout pregnancy, depending on your health needs. Your doctor or midwife can assess your health and determine whether you need bedrest at any time. If you do need to stay home – either for physical or mental health reasons – you may be able to complete your diploma or degree online.
Emotional Effects of Teen Pregnancy
Facing an unplanned pregnancy is scary and confusing. You are not alone. Counseling is available to help you navigate your emotions and learn about your options.
Coping with Emotional Stress
It is important to have a professional with whom you can trust. An adoption agency can provide you with a compassionate, experienced counselor, who has worked with others in your situation. This professional can listen to you and offer you emotional support during this difficult time, without any pressure, bias, or criticism. This professional can work with you throughout – and after – your pregnancy.
Free Services Available to Teen Birth Mothers
Expectant/Birth mothers who choose adoption can get supportive services they need – at no cost – throughout their pregnancy, and beyond. At Adoptions With Love, you can get the following services:
- Housing assistance. We can cover a deposit and several months of rent.
- Other living expenses, such as utilities, phone bills, food, transportation, and even maternity clothes, as needed.
- Medical coverage. We can help you find a doctor or midwife with whom you feel comfortable and can cover any uninsured medical expenses that relate to the pregnancy and birth, reimbursed after the adoption is complete.
- Our compassionate counselors are there to support you before and after the adoption.
- Legal services, by experienced and highly trained adoption attorneys in your state.
- Adoption planning. We can help you choose the perfect adoptive family for your child and custom design an adoption plan that best meets your needs.
Education and Resources on Teen Pregnancy
Relationship Education for Teens
Resources for Pregnant Teens
Importance of Family Support
Telling your family about your pregnancy can be one of the hardest things about your teen pregnancy. If you are considering adoption, you can seek guidance on this step from your adoption counselor. It may help to have a friend or someone else you trust with you when you break the news. If your family is willing to support you during this difficult time, it can make the pregnancy much easier. Their support can be the strength you need. Lean on the ones you love for that strength whenever you need it.
Life After Teen Pregnancy
Pregnancy is life changing. If you are trying to decide between adoption and parenthood, you may be wondering what life will be like after the pregnancy is over. The two offer two very different life paths.
Involvement with Open Adoption
If you choose open adoption, you may be embarking on the greatest adventure of your life. Open adoption can look different for everyone, but it simply means there is ongoing communication between birth and adoptive families after the adoption is complete. If you choose to maintain a relationship with your child’s family, you will not have to “say goodbye” forever. You can build that relationship and stay connected with them, seeing your child grow and progress, all while working toward your own personal and professional goals.
Balancing Education and Motherhood
Parenthood can be a wonderful experience but taking it on before you are ready can be challenging. It can be stressful, overwhelming, and lonely. If you are working toward a diploma or degree, trying to balance education with motherhood can be done – but it will require plenty of support and effort. You will need to account for childcare, financial responsibilities, and study time.
Facing Teen Pregnancy? Find the Support You Deserve
If you would like to discuss your options and learn more about adoption, contact Adoptions With Love today. We can work with you and help you come to a decision with confidence, without pressure, judgment, or bias. Our caring team is available to chat 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Our conversations are always confidential, and there is never any fee for an expectant/birth mother. Text us at 617-777-0072, call us at 1-800-722-7731. You may also contact us here.
