How to Honor Your Child’s Birth Mother this Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day is a special time for parents, especially when it is the first time celebrating. For new mothers, the day brings a special blend of joy and overwhelming love, as they are just starting to navigate life with a baby. For those who have faced infertility, Mother’s Day can feel even bigger. Years of struggling to conceive a child are in the past, and a new life has begun with your precious little one. No matter how you came to reach adoption, it is certainly a cause for celebration. Mother’s Day is a very special day to recognize your journey, to honor your relationship with your child, and to reflect on the family you have built.

What many adoptive parents (and people in general) do not know is that, on the Saturday before Mother’s Day, there is Birth Mother’s Day. Birth Mother’s Day is dedicated to the many women who have made an adoption plan for their child, an experience that is often complex, emotional, and deeply personal. As you consider your plans for Mother’s Day, you may also consider honoring Birth Mother’s Day, too.

Birth Mother’s Day is observed each year on the Saturday before Mother’s Day. There are many thoughtful ways to acknowledge your child’s birth mother, whether you have an open adoption, limited contact, or no direct communication at all. The most meaningful gestures are those that are respectful, considerate, and aligned with your relationship.

Honoring Your Child’s Birth Mother

New mothers feel an overwhelming sense of love for their child. This precious, beautiful baby has come into your life, and it is the most wonderful thing that could have ever happened. With that deep love comes a profound sense of gratitude. You are grateful to have your child in your life, and you feel fortunate that your child’s birth mother chose you to be her mother. Of course, a birth mother deserves to be celebrated on Mother’s Day, as well. This day serves the perfect opportunity for adoptive mothers to show their appreciation by honoring their child’s birth mother. Here are some ideas to inspire you:

Send a special present. Your child’s birth mother may appreciate a gift that has meaning. This gift does not have to be expensive. In fact, sometimes the simplest treasures pack the most meaning. A necklace with your child’s birthdate on it, an engraved frame with a photo of your child, or a set of baby’s footprints will bring plenty of meaning to this special woman. Before sending a gift, consider what level of contact is appropriate based on your relationship and any agreed-upon boundaries. For some birth mothers, a simple card or message may feel more comfortable than a physical gift.

Start a tradition of charity. If you have a close relationship with your child’s birth mother, ask her about her favorite charity. If she is an animal lover, she may choose a local shelter. Has she been touched by an illness or disability? She may choose an organization that supports one of these causes. If you are not in touch with your child’s birth mother, that is okay, too. You can choose your favorite organization and make the donation in her name. Maybe you make a donation to your adoption agency? Make it a tradition! This is a beautiful way to honor the birth mother, while teaching your child the value of charitable giving.

Plant a tree. Your child’s birth mother brought a new life into this world that is unlike any other. Your child is special, and you can honor her roots by planting a tree or perennial plant in her honor. Just as she planted an important seed in your life, you can plant new life in Mother Earth. This symbolic gift honors your child’s birth mother while honoring the beautiful impact she has made in the world.

Spend some time with her. If you have an open adoption and both parties are comfortable, spending time together may be a meaningful way to acknowledge the day. However, it’s important to approach this thoughtfully. Mother’s Day weekend can bring up a wide range of emotions, and your child’s birth mother may or may not feel ready for in-person connection. Let her take the lead, and prioritize what feels most supportive for everyone involved.

Making Lasting Memories. Just as there are countless reasons you love your child, there are countless ways to make your first Mother’s Day special. You and your little one can start new traditions, carve out quality time together, and share many memories in the years ahead. Whether you enjoy brunch at your favorite restaurant, a picnic in a park, or a simple meal at home, being together is the most important part of Mother’s Day.

Keep your child at the center of the experience. As your child grows, honoring their birth mother can also become a way to support their identity and understanding of adoption. Small gestures and open conversations can help them feel secure in their story and relationships.

Why Honoring Your Child’s Birth Mother Matters

Recognizing your child’s birth mother can be a meaningful way to honor your child’s full story. It reinforces respect, gratitude, and openness—values that can positively shape how your child understands their adoption as they grow. It can also help normalize conversations about adoption within your family, creating a foundation of honesty and compassion.

How to Connect with Your Child’s Birth Mother

Adoptions With Love wants to wish every mother – birth and adoptive – a Happy Mother’s Day. If you would like help reconnecting with your child’s birth mother, or you are about to become an adoptive parent who would like to connect for the first time, please reach out to Adoptions With Love. We would love to help you make this incredible connection. Call us any time at 800-722-7731, text us at 617-777-0072, or click here to contact us online.