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Are you facing an unplanned pregnancy? If so, you may be considering your options, including adoption. While adoption can feel overwhelming, it can be made much easier with the support and guidance of a trusted adoption agency. This professional can walk you through the entire adoption process.
As you consider placing your baby for adoption, keep in mind that adoption is a positive, loving, and selfless choice. It means placing the needs of your baby before your own wants. You may not have planned this pregnancy, but you can take charge now and lovingly make an adoption plan that offers both you and your baby a bright future.
Starting the adoption process can feel intimidating, but it can help to know the steps before diving in. Here are some clear steps that can answer that burning question: ‘What is the adoption process?’ to help you feel prepared.
What Is Adoption and How Does It Work?
Adoption is the legal process by which adults acquire full parental responsibility for a child, becoming the legal parents themselves. This can be established with the support of private adoption agencies, foster care, or international adoption agencies. Adoption can also involve stepparents, when a parent marries someone who is not the child’s birth parent, or another relative who steps in to assume parental responsibility. When a child is legally adopted, the birth parents’ parental rights are terminated.
Why Some Birth Parents Choose Adoption
Adoption is a very personal decision. There are various reasons that birth parents choose adoption. If you are considering adoption for your baby, it may be because you are young and only just beginning to work toward your personal and professional goals. You may be in college or high school, working to earn your degree.
You could be facing financial strain. Raising a child is not an affordable venture. It costs an average of $389,000 to raise a child from birth to age 18 – not counting college tuition. For anyone who is unprepared for this incredibly costly and life-changing chapter, it can be a challenging road.
The Adoption Process for Birth Parents
Step 1: Learn About Adoption and Explore Your Options
Before you contact an adoption agency, it can help to learn a bit about the adoption process first. For many expectant/birth parents, adoption means choice. It gives you a path forward during a challenging time. With the support of an adoption agency, you can custom-design an adoption plan that makes you feel comfortable – and confident in – the decision. You can create this adoption plan while knowing that your child will be safe, well cared for, and deeply loved. You can also rest assured that your needs will be met, as well.
Types of Adoption to Consider
There are several types of adoption agencies available. A good starting point can be determining which type will work for you. The following are the most common types of adoption agencies:
- This is a domestic adoption agency that handles the adoption of infants and young children within the U.S.
- Foster care. This is a state-run system that handles the temporary and permanent placement of children. Children placed in foster care have been removed from their homes due to unsafe or unstable circumstances. This is not a voluntary choice for expectant/birth parents.
Questions to Ask Yourself Before You Begin
Before setting out on the adoption process, you may want to ask yourself some questions:
- Am I ready to become a parent?
- If you are already a parent, how will another baby affect my children?
- What kind of life do I envision for myself?
- What kind of life do I envision for my baby?
- Where do I see myself in 5 years?
These are just a few questions to consider when trying to decide whether adoption is right for you and your baby. Take your time to reflect, pray, and/or meditate on the decision for as long as you need.
Step 2: Choose a Licensed Adoption Agency or Professional
The next step will be to choose an adoption agency that you can trust. A fully licensed, private, domestic adoption agency is going to be the best type of adoption agency for you. This professional can offer you supportive services – at no cost to you, the expectant/birth parent. You should never have to pay for an adoption agency’s services when making an adoption plan. You can, in fact, receive financial assistance from the adoption agency.
At Adoptions With Love, for example, expectant/birth parents planning adoption have access to the following supportive services:
- Financial assistance, including rent, utilities, phone bills, and even maternity clothes, as needed.
- Medical care. We can help you find a midwife or doctor with whom you feel comfortable, and cover any uninsured medical expenses related to pregnancy and birth.
- Compassionate counseling, before and up to a year after the adoption.
- Legal support to ensure your adoption is handled smoothly, safely, and legally.
- Adoption design assistance. We can help you choose the adoptive parent(s) and custom design an adoption plan that best meets your needs.
- Ongoing support. Our team stays connected with birth and adoptive families for years after the adoption is complete.
What to Look for in an Adoption Agency
An adoption agency should offer you a sense of support and peace of mind. With the right adoption professional, you can rest assured that your adoption will be handled smoothly, and your rights will be protected.
The best adoption agency will offer you direct, one-on-one support that offers you the dignity, respect, and care that you deserve. This professional will offer you the supportive services mentioned above, ensuring your physical, mental, and emotional health and well-being are a top priority.
Step 3: Create an Adoption Plan
Once you have found the adoption agency with whom you can trust, you can begin to consider the type of adoption plan you want.
Decisions Birth Parents Can Make
At Adoptions With Love, expectant/birth parents can choose from the following:
An open adoption plan involves direct communication between birth and adoptive families – before and after the adoption is complete. This can look different for every adoptive family. The form and frequency of communication may be determined by you, the expectant/birth parent. You can choose to stay connected via:
- Text messages
- Emails
- Phone calls
- Virtual calls
- In-person reunions
You can choose a mix of the above options. You can also determine how frequently these updates will occur. You may choose monthly updates, check-ins several times a year, or once/year updates. The choices are all yours.
With a semi-open adoption, you may choose to keep communication between your adoption agency. With a closed adoption, there is no contact information or communication shared between the birth and adoptive family. There is no right or wrong choice when it comes to designing your ideal adoption plan. You should choose whatever makes you most comfortable.
Want Help Creating an Adoption Plan?
Step 4: Choose an Adoptive Family
Next, you can begin to look for your child’s adoptive family. Your adoption agency can help you find the perfect family for your baby. At Adoptions With Love, for example, you can browse the adoptive family profiles of those who are ready to adopt.
What to Look for in an Adoptive Family
Choosing the right adoptive family for your baby is a highly personal decision. You may want to consider the following factors when making this decision:
- What values, culture, and lifestyle do you hope your child grows up with?
- Location (close by or faraway)?
- The couple or individual’s family situation. Large family? Supportive friends?
- What educational opportunities would they provide?
- Religious views. If this is important to you: Does the family share your religion? Are they devout? Do they attend church/temple, mosque regularly? How about holiday traditions?
- What about hobbies?
- Do they travel?
- Are they interested in sports? Visual arts? Performing arts?
Step 5: Complete the Legal Adoption Process
Once you have chosen your baby’s adoptive family and designed the adoption plan that best works for you, you are on your way to completing the legal adoption process. This part may feel the hardest, as it makes the plans official. Your adoption agency can walk you through every step of the adoption process, including the legal proceedings.
Understanding Consent and Legal Documents
Adoption laws are quite complex and vary by state. This is why it is critical to have an adoption agency in your corner. This professional can offer a team of adoption attorneys who are well-versed with the adoption laws of your home state. They can help you understand your rights as an expectant/birth parent, including consent and when it may be given. Depending on your state, you may have to wait until after you have given birth before consenting to the adoption. Some states allow consent to be given right away, while others have a 24-72-hour waiting period. These waiting periods give you the time you need to meet your baby, recover from birth, and consider your decision again before making it official. It is important to take all the time you need before consenting to the adoption. Remember: It is never too late to make an adoption plan.
Role of Legal Professionals
The adoption agency can also help you understand every step of the adoption process as you move through it. The legal professional in your adoption agency can handle the legal aspects of the journey, while the counselor can support your emotional needs. The adoption planning staff can help you design your adoption plan and oversee the entire adoption process.
Step 6: Finalize the Adoption
Once you are ready to consent to adoption, you can begin to finalize your baby’s adoption. This is the final step of the legal journey. Adoption, however, is a lifelong experience. It is not over once the paperwork is filed. It is an ever-evolving process that can be supported over the years by your adoption professional.
What Happens After Finalization?
The adoption finalization may feel like an ending, but it is, in fact, the beginning of a new chapter in your life. If you have chosen an open adoption – or semi-open adoption – you can look forward to lifelong updates. You can focus on your own health, both physically and mentally. You can also focus on your own future – by working toward your professional and personal goals.
With an open or semi-open adoption, you can rest assured that there is no “goodbye forever.” You will see your child again, and you can build deep and meaningful relationships with your baby’s adoptive family.
How Long Does the Adoption Process Take?
It is important to remember that there is no deadline when it comes to making an adoption plan. You can take all the time you need when considering adoption for your baby. You can start this process at the beginning of your pregnancy or at the end of your pregnancy.
Choose Adoptions With Love for Your Adoption Journey
As you consider adoption for your baby, keep in mind that it is never too late to make an adoption plan. Contact Adoptions With Love to learn more about the adoption process. You can receive commitment-free information by calling (617) 964-4357, texting (confidentially) (617) 777-0072, or reaching out online.