Dear Adoptions With Love:
On February 28th at 2:45 in the morning, I gave birth to a beautiful, precious baby boy. I never thought I would have to give up the one thing I cherished most – him. It was the hardest thing I have had to do yet, but I remind myself everyday that I have given him a life of love, fun, and everything he will ever need. It has been so hard dealing with the pain of knowing that I may never hold him again. It’s been hard dealing with the feeling of being empty inside and like half a person. I know the pain will eventually fade, and the more I think about how happy he will be, it makes me a little happier. It’s hard handing your child off to practically a stranger, but I feel confident in my decision and know that they will raise him right. It summed it all up when I met the adoptive parents and they told me not to worry – I will never forget the way the mother and father looked at me when they said those words. It is also hard when you think about how you would’ve raised him/her compared to how the adoptive parents will do things. I know that in the end everything will work out for the best. I also thank God everyday that there are people out there who care so much. Without these wonderful people, whom I consider my family now, my child would have been in a single-parent household and we would be struggling to get by. I am very proud of the adoptive parents because raising a child is no easy feat.
The people at Adoptions With Love have been very understanding and never made me feel as though I was an inadequate person. They treated me with respect and told me about the feelings to come. To tell you the truth, I didn’t think it would be this hard or that my feelings would’ve been this strong. They did their best in preparing me for this. Also the lawyer and the social worker were a big help. The lawyer did not pressure me to do anything I didn’t want to and the social worker was great. I felt like some of the world was lifted off my shoulders when I left her office.
It hurts to let something you love so much to go but reunions are always possible. I am starting not to worry because I know he will have an excellent life and will grow up to be very smart. My love for my child will never die or even fade. I have faith in the parents for telling him this over and over. I know now what true love is and I know the time will fly by so I can hold him in my arms again. I am impatiently waiting for that beautiful day.