Archive for the ‘Birth Parents’ Category

“Giving a Baby Up for Adoption”: What Expectant/Birth Mothers Should Know

If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy, you may be considering adoption for your baby. You may be looking to learn more about the adoption process, or trying to decide whether it is the right decision for you. It is important to know what adoption is and what you can expect as an expectant mother. It is also important to know that you are not “giving your baby up for adoption.” Adoption is not giving up.

Adoption is a positive choice that a mother makes for her baby. It is a thoughtful decision that takes great strength, compassion, and love. When a mother chooses adoption, she chooses to give her baby a life beyond what she can provide at the time – a life full of love, stability, safety, and opportunity. The phrase “give baby up for adoption” does not embody all this, yet has become a common way to talk about adoption. “Giving up a baby for adoption” is not an accurate description of what happens in the adoption process. When an expectant/birth mother decides to place her child with an adoptive family, she is choosing to give her baby a better life. She is putting her child’s needs above her own. She is planning for the rest of her child’s life, and therefore making a profoundly selfless and loving choice.

If you are considering adoption, you are most likely thinking of your child’s best interests. You want to give your baby the best possible life you can, even if it cannot be with you. You may want your child to have a stable and loving home, a great education, and many opportunities for his or her future. To choose to carry a child to term, give birth, and make an adoption is a brave and honorable decision. You are doing everything BUT giving up, in every sense of the term. You are giving it your all.

Rather than saying, “give my baby up for adoption,” try saying, “make an adoption plan.”

Making an adoption plan means planning ahead for your baby’s life. Should you choose to make an adoption plan, know that you can choose the family for your baby. You can make a plan that will make you feel comfortable. You can even choose an open adoption, which means you will have some form of contact or relationship with the adoptive family as your child grows.

At Adoptions With Love, every adoptive family agrees to an open adoption or semi-open adoption plan. You can choose how your adoption plan will go. It may involve email updates, texting or phone conversations, or letters and pictures – our caring social workers will help you go over each option. After listening to your wishes and researching hopeful parents, our staff will contact the adoptive family to help you move forward along in the adoption process.

Open adoption has been found to be a positive choice for both children AND birth parents. In fact, most children involved in an open adoption are very happy. Open adoption also gives birth mothers great peace of mind, knowing that they are still a part of their child’s life. While open adoption is a great decision for many expectant/birth mothers, it is certainly not the only option. You can also choose a closed adoption, if you wish to keep your personal information private, or if you think open adoption will be too difficult right now. Some women start with a closed adoption plan, but then open it up down the road. This is okay, too. Adoptions With Love keeps photos and letter-updates on file for every adopted child for this very reason. Whatever you decide, we will support you and your decision.

Adoption is a selfless, courageous choice for anyone who is not in the position to raise a baby. Do not let society or anyone in your life tell you that you are “giving your baby up for adoption.” Instead, tell them what you are actually doing: Giving an opportunity to your child for the rest of his or her life. You should feel proud and brave for considering this path for your child.

Making an adoption plan is a decision that is yours and yours alone. It is not something anyone else can push you to do, and it is not something you should feel pressured into by any means. Adoptions With Love understands that this is a life changing decision, and our loving staff will support and guide you along, without any bias or judgment.

If you would like to learn more about making an adoption plan for your baby, feel free to contact us anytime – day or night – at 1-800-722-7731. You may also text us confidentially at 617-777-0072.


Adoption FAQ: When is My Adoption Decision Final?

Are you facing an unplanned pregnancy and considering adoption for your baby? Adoption is a positive choice that, for many, comes after much thought and consideration. If you are exploring this option or looking to learn more about the process, you may be wondering: When do I need to make a final decision? What is the timeframe for making an adoption plan? Can I ever change my mind?

As a private, non-profit adoption agency working with expectant/birth mothers all over the United States, Adoptions With Love wants you to be prepared for the road ahead. In this article, we will help you understand your timeline for making an adoption plan – and a final decision – for your baby.

To understand the timeline of an adoption, it is important to first understand the legal considerations involved. During the adoption process, the birth parents – you and the biological father, if known – will need to relinquish their parental rights. A birth mother can only do this after her baby is born. The last legal step is the finalization of adoption in court. Before an adoption can be finalized, some state qualifications must be met.

No adoption is final until an adoption surrender is signed. A surrender is a legal document in which the birth parent agrees and consents to the adoption of the child. The laws vary by state on when exactly this can happen, but all states require birth mothers to wait until after birth to finalize their decision and sign legal paperwork. This gives the birth mother time to rest, meet her baby, and think about her decision again before terminating her parental rights. No decisions made before the birth of her baby are binding in any way.

Some states allow birth mothers to sign surrender forms for adoption immediately following the baby’s birth. Other states, however, require a certain number of hours or days to pass before the birth mother can sign anything official. In some states, official papers must be signed before a judge. In other states, however, this is not necessary. In Massachusetts, a birth mother must wait four days to sign a consent to the adoption.

Once the adoption papers have been signed, if there is a “revocation period” during which you – the birth mother – can change your mind. This is part of your birth mother rights. Should you change your mind, your child would be returned to you. Of course, this varies state to state. Only some states allow you to revoke your consent to the adoption, days after the papers have been signed.

Once the adoption consent forms are signed and the revocation period has passed, the birth parent no longer has any rights to the child and cannot change her or his mind. Adoption is a lifelong decision. This is why it is important to speak with an attorney and social worker about the legal procedure in your state, as well as your rights as an expectant/birth mom. Adoptions With Love provides all birth mothers with free access to attorneys who specialize in adoption.

To learn about the laws specific to your state now, you can visit the website of the Child Welfare Information Gateway. You may also contact a reputable adoption agency that works nationwide, like Adoptions With Love. Adoptions With Love has close relationships with expert and compassionate adoption attorneys all over the U.S. If you need legal guidance at any point in your journey, we can meet you wherever you are, to discuss your legal rights and your adoption decision.

Adoptions With Love wants to be sure that you feel comfortable and confident in your adoption decision. We place no pressure to make an immediate plan. No matter where you live, there is plenty of time to finalize your decision about adoption. You could make your decision from the hospital bed, or you may choose to wait a bit longer. There is no right or wrong here. This is your plan.

Adoption is a lifelong choice; however, it does not have to mean saying “goodbye” to your child. Through open adoption, you can keep in touch with your child’s family over the years. Part of the adoption process involves creating an adoption agreement, often called an “open adoption agreement,” that outlines the level of contact a birth parent will have with their child and adoptive family over the years. You can choose to receive emails with photos throughout the years. You and the adoptive family can choose to keep in touch with in-person visits occasionally. Adoptions With Love can serve as a liaison for these updates, or you may choose to work with the family directly. Each birth mother may choose something different. Your open adoption plan may be drawn up in the form of a legal contract long before birth. It can also be tweaked over the years, to accommodate the needs of a growing child.

Should you decide that adoption is the best path for you and your child, Adoptions With Love will support you and guide you through this journey. We will offer help without pressure, judgment or bias, and work with you on finalizing your decision, respecting any choice that you make. Contact us to learn more about making an adoption plan by calling us at 800-722-7731 or texting 617-777-0072. You may also download our free eBook below, “Adoption FAQ for Birth Mothers,” for more information.


Baby Safe Haven or Adoption: What Birth Mothers Should Know

In 1999, there was a spike in the number of babies abandoned by their birth parents. Many of these babies were left in unsafe places, and many were harmed as a result. If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy, you may be able to imagine how many of these birth mothers were feeling at the time: alone, scared, anxious, hopeless, and unsure what to do.

In response to keep babies safe, particularly in these cases where birth parents could not parent the baby, many states came up with Safe Haven laws. A baby safe haven is a place that a birth parent can leave their newborn baby, safely, such as a hospital or fire station, and not be prosecuted. If you have seen shows like NBC’s This is Us, or CBS’ Code Black, you have likely heard of a baby safe haven laws.

If you are pregnant and are unsure what to do, you are certainly not alone. Across the United States, thousands of young women are facing unintended pregnancies. Many, like you, may not feel ready to parent a baby for life. They may be exploring other options. In this article, we will explain baby safe havens and what they can mean for your baby. We will also share helpful information about a positive, alternative option: adoption.

Baby Safe Havens:

Safe Haven Infant Protection Laws allow a person to leave  a baby anonymously in a safe specified location. As long as the child has not been abused, the birth parent may use a baby safe haven without facing charges. The purpose of these laws is to protect babies from being hurt or dying as a result of neglect.

Perhaps you have heard heartbreaking stories of infants left in dumpsters. The birth mothers responsible may have been under severe emotional stress. Perhaps they had hidden their pregnancies, fearful of the reaction of their families. They may have been in an abusive relationship and fearful of the birth father becoming angered by the situation. They may have felt like they had no other options and nowhere to turn. Whatever the reason, these mothers abandoned their baby. All too often, this abandonment results in the baby’s death. It is also illegal, and results in arrest and prosecution if found. Safe haven laws work to avoid these tragedies, providing birth parents with safe places to leave their newborns.

Many states have adopted different Safe Haven Laws, so it is important to reach out to a knowledgeable professional regarding the laws of your state. In Massachusetts, for example, a parent may legally surrender newborn infants 7 days old or younger at a hospital, police station, or manned fire station without facing criminal prosecution.

According to the National Safe Haven Alliance, over 2,000 babies have been positively impacted by the Baby Safe program in the United States. Many of these babies have been adopted by loving families. However, most babies left in a safe haven do end up in the foster care system. Children in foster care can stay there for many years, without a permanent family. If your child goes to foster care, you will likely not know (or have any say in) who adopts your baby.

Private Adoption:

While the Safe Haven laws have protected the lives of many babies and birth mothers, there is an alternative path for those who want to ensure a happy and healthy life for their baby. At Adoptions With Love, we understand that facing an unplanned pregnancy can be scary and overwhelming. Often, it is a time of complete crisis. We want expectant/birth mothers to know that adoption is an option for you. No matter how far along you are in your pregnancy, and even if you have already given birth, you can make an adoption plan for your baby. Adoption is a positive and loving choice for many reasons, such as:

  1. Adoption puts you in control. Instead of dropping your child off at a fire station or leaving him/her at a hospital, never knowing what will happen, adoption allows the birth mother to make more decisions for her baby. You can hand-select the adoptive family. You can imagine the kind of life you want for your child. You can even maintain contact with the adoptive family and child, with a custom-made open adoption plan.
  2. Adoption gives you the gift of time. It gives you time to think over your decision, and imagine the kind of life you want for your unborn baby. With adoption, you need not feel that you are neglecting or “giving up your baby.” Instead, you can take your time to consider your decision and make a thoughtful plan for his or her life. You also gain support from a private adoption agency, such as Adoptions With Love, that will guide you through the adoption process. With an adoption agency, you will also find great emotional, physical, and financial support during pregnancy and long after the adoption is complete.
  3. Adoption gives you support and guidance. Your adoption agency’s social workers will sit with you to discuss your options and create your ideal birth and adoption plan. You will also be able to discuss your experience, feelings, and questions with a caring counselor any time of day. Unlike a Baby Safe Haven, where you leave your child and are left dealing with the emotional consequences all alone, you will have a network of professionals who care about you and your baby. They will check-in regularly and be your shoulder to lean on, all at no cost to you. There are a variety of services an adoption agency can provide, such as legal assistance and help finding prenatal care, completely free of charge.

At Adoptions With Love, we want the best for birth mothers and their babies. If you are facing an unplanned pregnancy and are unsure of what to do, let us help. We can chat with you about your options, with zero pressure or judgment. We are here for you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Call us – for free and confidentially – toll-free at 1-800-722-7731, or text us confidentially at 617-777-0072.


Adoption FAQ: Do I Need Consent from the Biological Father to Make an Adoption Plan?

Unplanned pregnancy often brings about many questions for expectant and birth mothers. Some of the most commonly asked questions we hear at Adoptions With Love relate to the biological father – his rights, his involvement, his consent in making an adoption plan. As an expectant/birth mother, you too may be wondering, ‘Do I need consent from the biological father to make an adoption plan?’, ‘Should he be involved in this process?’, or perhaps, ‘What is the father’s role in all of this?’ What if you do not have a relationship with the baby’s father at all?

Every situation is unique. Right now, you may or may not be in contact with the biological father. You may or may not have a good relationship with him. Perhaps you do not know where, or who, the baby’s father is. This is okay. When you work with a trustworthy adoption agency, you can always feel safe and confident as you move through the adoption process, even if and when the biological father gets involved. You will also have a good understanding of the biological father’s rights in your state.

You see, adoption and biological father consent laws vary state to state. Depending on where you live, the biological father may or may not need to know about your adoption plan. If the father is known, he may be required to establish paternity (i.e. prove his fatherhood) if he wishes to be involved with your decision. If he does not establish paternity, or waits too long to do so, he may not have any say in the adoption. Some states require that the father of the child be legally married to the mother in order to have any parental rights.

Some states require a biological father to be made aware of his rights and responsibilities, if he is known. If the biological father is unknown, unaware, or unsupportive, some states will allow you to pursue the adoption without his involvement. You can learn about the adoption laws and birth father rights of your state by contacting Adoptions With Love. The legal assistance we provide to expectant/birth parents is always free of charge.

If you have a safe and sound relationship with the biological father of your baby, we encourage you to talk to him about your pregnancy and interest in adoption. You may find that, in your situation, he becomes a great source of emotional support. In fact, you may discover that he wants to go through this journey with you. At Adoptions With Love, 80 percent of birth fathers are involved – on some level – in making an adoption plan. They have supported this positive choice and signed the legal documents allowing the adoption. If this is not your situation, that is completely okay, too. You always have support available, whenever you need it, at Adoptions With Love. Our caring staff is here to help you day or night, with free counseling services as needed. You are not alone.

If you are unsure of how to tell the biological father the news, try to think of it as an educational process. You can help him understand the positive benefits of adoption, and explain to him how you arrived at this decision. If he is involved in the adoption, he can always opt for a different adoption plan than you. He may desire only a semi-open relationship with an adoptive family, while you decide on a fully open adoption. Or, he may not wish for any contact at all. This is okay. Each expectant parent gets to define their relationship with their child and with the adoptive family, on an individual basis.

If the biological father is on board with the adoption plan, he is also entitled to free support and counseling at Adoptions With Love. He will likely have many of his own complicated emotions surrounding the adoption and pregnancy, which we can help him work through, as well.

Should a biological father disagree with the adoption plan, he must be fully prepared to establish paternal rights in court, as well as take care of you and the baby, both emotionally and financially, for many years to come. If he is ready commit to a child, he must also be willing to commit to child support.

Some expectant/birth mothers may not be in contact with the biological father or may not feel safe contacting him. If this is your situation, Adoptions With Love can step in and make contact as needed. Our professional team can contact him through a licensed adoption attorney. We will present him with his legal rights as a father, and work to get those rights relinquished so that you can move forward with the adoption plan. You do not have to have any direct contact with the biological father at all. Adoptions With Love has the experience and professional wherewithal to handle all kinds of circumstances. We also have the appropriate legal resources to terminate parental rights as needed. Should you ever feel uncomfortable regarding contact with the birth father, Adoptions With Love can handle it. We do not want a birth mother to feel stressed about this situation during her pregnancy.

Should an expectant/birth mother not know who the birth father is, that is completely okay, too. We will walk you through the adoption process and be a shoulder to lean on along the way. We will also help you understand your state’s adoption laws in this type of situation.

Whether you have a relationship with the biological father, do not have any contact with him, or simply do not know who he is, you can always find support, respect, and advice at Adoptions With Love. You should never feel pressured into a decision – even by the biological father. Remember that this is your decision. As an expectant/birth mother, only you know what is best for your baby.

Adoptions With Love can help you, no matter the circumstance, with sensitivity, support, and zero judgment. For even more answers and information about adoption and birth father rights, please download our free eBook, “Adoption FAQ for Birth Mothers.” You may also call us toll-free at 800-722-7731 or text us confidentially at 617-777-0072. We are available anytime of day, any day of the week to answer your call.


Adoption FAQ: What Will My Child Think of Me?

While considering adoption, you may find yourself overwhelmed with many thoughts, feelings, and questions – Some of the most pressing being, “how will adoption affect my child?” and “what will my child think of me when he or she grows up?”

As hard as it may be in this moment, making an adoption plan can have a very positive impact on your child’s future. And despite what you may have heard or seen, choosing adoption does not mean giving up or hurting your relationship with your child. Rather, it means making a plan for your child’s life, and giving him or her a safe and loving place to grow. Adoption is a decision made with great love and thoughtfulness, and your child will come to understand this in time. You may even get the chance to explain this choice to your child yourself.

You see, adoption today is no longer the taboo or secretive subject that it once was. An estimated 99 percent of adopted children ages five and older know that they were adopted. Most adoptions today are open adoptions, meaning the birth mother has some relationship with her child’s adoptive family. It is, overall, considered a positive experience. An estimated 90 percent of those children have positive feelings about their adoption situation.

Choosing adoption is a special way of showing love to your child. It means taking the time to put your child’s needs above your own, to give him or her the best possible life you can give at this time. Your child will be reminded of this as he or she grows. You will never be forgotten. Adoptions With Love constantly hears from our adoptees, now young adults, who have told us how thankful they are that their birthparents gave them the opportunity for a wonderful life.

Research has found that the majority of adopted children experience full and happy lives with their adoptive families. They are more likely to be read to, sung to, and told stories to every single day. They are also more likely to participate in extracurricular activities, and eat dinners with their families each night. Most adopted children are in very good health, and live in safe neighborhoods with two loving parents. This leads to many other positive effects on children.

If you are concerned about the safety or well-being of your child, rest assured that when you work with a licensed adoption agency, all adoptive parents are thoroughly screened and vetted. They go through a series of FBI background checks and interviews to ensure they are ready to raise a baby. Who are adoptive families, exactly? Many of those looking to adopt are not able to conceive children biologically. Some have experienced infertility. Their biggest dream is to become a parent.

Making an adoption plan does not mean that you would not make a great parent. It does not mean that you do not love your child. It actually means the opposite. Adoption means you love your child so much that you want him or her to have the best possible life. It is a selfless decision that puts your child’s basic needs – safety, stability, nutrition, health, permanence – above your own. It means giving your child the gift of a forever family, and a life full of opportunity. Your child will grow up knowing this. The adoptive parents will always show you respect and talk about your loving decision.

If you choose to make an open adoption plan, you can also stay involved in your child’s life in some way. Your child can grow up knowing who you are, and the loving choice that you made. Your child will also have answers to many questions that arise in adoption. For this reason, most birth parents maintain some form of contact with the adoptive families over the years.

Adoptions With Love is an open adoption agency, meaning every adoptive family agrees to at least a semi-open adoption, in which they send letters and photos to the agency on a regular basis. Birth parents can access these if and when they are ready. In more open adoption arrangements, adoptive families may choose to send letters and pictures directly to the birth parents. Most adoptive families at Adoptions With Love are open to some direct ongoing communication with the birth parents throughout the years. In some situations, the adoptive families grow close with the birth mother of their child, and keep in touch as though she is a part of their family. In this modern-day world, driven by technology, adoption communication is likely to evolve over time – turning into emails, video chats, and more. Birth parents can take comfort in knowing how their child is growing and developing. All the while, adoptive parents can enjoy sharing their pride in their child.

The staff at Adoptions With Love can help you choose the best type of adoption plan for your needs, whether that is open or closed, or somewhere in between. We write contracts that are legal and binding, but also leave room for renegotiation over the years. This is an important factor and in the best interest of the child. As your child grows, his or her emotional needs will change. When the adoptive child becomes a teen or young adult, he or she may decide on the kind of relationship to have with the birth parents. Adoptions With Love is always here to help guide everyone through this process. We have a very active search and reunion program that continues to grow. We are committed to helping birth and adoptive families maintain respectful relationships over the years.

Adoption is not an easy decision, nor an “easy way out.” As an expectant/birth mother, you are putting tons of love, thought, and time into making an adoption plan. You are planning for your baby’s life! You are providing a permanent family, a safe place to grow, and emotional and financial support with ready parents that have always dreamed of raising a child. This will all be explained to your child as he or she grows. Your child will always love and respect you for this.

If you have any more questions about how adoption will affect your child, or how your child will remember you after the adoption takes place, please do not hesitate to get in touch. Call us toll-free at 800-722-7731 or text us confidentially at 617-777-0072. You may also get more information on commonly asked birth mother questions in our free eBook, “Adoption FAQ for Birth Mothers,” which you can download below.


Adoption FAQ: What Happens After an Adoption Takes Place?

If you are an expectant/birth mother considering adoption, you likely have many questions regarding the adoption process. Not to mention, you may be working through many emotions in trying to make the best possible decision is for you and your unborn baby. Adoption is not an easy decision, and right now, you deserve all of the answers you can get.

At Adoptions With Love, we believe an informed decision is the best decision. That is why we are here to provide you with the information you need to make a choice for your baby – not just about the adoption process, but also what happens after the fact. What happens after you place a baby for adoption? Is post-adoption support available to you?

Expectant and birth mothers making an adoption plan deserve a whole lot of love and support – not only during their pregnancy, but after the adoption takes place, as well. When you work with a caring adoption agency, they will recognize this. If you make an adoption plan with Adoptions With Love, for example, you will be entitled to ongoing care and free counseling for a year after your baby’s birth and placement. We are always here for you, and encourage you to take advantage of this unending support.  The support you receive directly from Adoptions With Love is ongoing.

After an adoption takes place, you can expect to experience a range of complicated emotions – love, grief, wonder, regret, hope, relief. After pregnancy and delivery, the body needs time to recover and heal. So does the heart. Talking through any difficult feelings with your adoption counselor can help ease your transition back into life, and help your heart cope even years after the adoption takes place.

In addition to the free counseling services offered, Adoptions With Love also maintains a letter and picture program between birth parents and adoptive families. This way, the birth mother can receive updates on her child over the years, after the adoption takes place. This is a nice way to stay in touch and up-to-date on what is happening in each family’s lives.

Depending on the type of adoption plan you choose, you may also expect a more involved relationship with your child’s family after the adoption takes place. Many of our families opt for open adoption arrangements that involve direct contact between both families. This allows birth parents to stay in touch with their child over the years, and gives the child access to many answers about his or her adoption story. Open adoption can take on many different forms. It may include emails, phone calls, or even in-person visits. The open adoption plan is one that is determined by the birth mother and agreed upon with the adoptive family. Adoptions With Love will assist setting up an open adoption plan. The birth mother may determine how much or how little communication she wants, and the plan may evolve over the years. Open adoption has been proven very positive for children and for birth mothers, who often find peace of mind in ongoing updates, after the adoption is finalized.

Adoptions With Love can also act as a liaison and help coordinate ongoing contact between birth and adoptive families, if needed. We are also here if you just want to say hi. Our staff loves to hear from birth and adoptive families over the years. We like to develop a relationship with each birth mother and adoptive family we help. You can think of Adoptions With Love as a part of your forever family.

In addition to our compassionate counselors at Adoptions With Love, birth mothers find it helpful to have a supportive network of others who have walked in similar shoes. That is why Adoptions With Love hosts ongoing support groups and workshops for birth mothers who have chosen adoption. After your adoption is finalized, you can confide and share your experiences with other young women who have made adoption plans. You should never feel alone in this adoption journey. You should never feel alone after your adoption takes place.

No matter your circumstance, or who you have in your support team, Adoptions With Love will always be here to help. We can guide you throughout your journey, from pregnancy to the adoption placement and beyond. To learn more about our ongoing adoption services, or to talk to a professional about what to expect after your child’s adoption, please do not hesitate to reach out. Call Amy, Nancy, Jess, Kelly, and Brittany at 800-722-7731 today. Or text us confidentially at 617-777-0072. You may also get more answers about adoption in our new eBook, “Adoption FAQ for Birth Mothers,” below.


Adoption FAQ: How Much Does Adoption Cost for Birth Mothers?

Facing an unplanned pregnancy can be a very emotional time for expectant mothers. There are often many fears and concerns, particularly when it comes to care and costs. Women who turn to Adoptions With Love can rest assured that all fees and expenses involving the adoption will be covered, free of charge.

At Adoptions With Love, we want expectant/birth mothers to feel completely comfortable with their adoption plan. We are here to guide you every step of the way. Adoption is a big decision, and you deserve all of the support in the world at this difficult time. That is why, at a caring, non-profit adoption agency like AWL, all fees for the adoption are free of charge, including counseling and legal assistance. Some of these services extend beyond birth. If you are still wondering what exactly these free adoption services entail, you are certainly not alone. Many expectant mothers have the same question. Here, we will explore some of the birth mother services available to you at Adoptions With Love.

Counseling Services

The caring staff at Adoptions With Love offers free counseling for expectant mothers throughout pregnancy and post-partum period. We understand that this journey is an emotional one. Making an adoption plan for your baby can bring up an array of complex emotions – love, hope, confusion, grief. No mother should feel that she is alone in this journey. Even with emotional support from family and friends, it is helpful to have a professional available. Our caring staff offers support whenever you need it, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. We continue this care for years after the adoption takes place.

Designing an Adoption Plan

Adoptions With Love is here to guide you through the process of making a personalized adoption plan. This is an important step in the adoption journey. As an expectant mother, you likely have many questions. Our experienced team can work with you to design a plan with which you are comfortable and confident. When you make an adoption plan, you can choose a family for your baby and how much communication (if any) you would like to have with them. Would you like to receive email updates on your child? Do you wish to have phone conversations with the adoptive parents? Are you hoping to receive photos throughout the years? Do you dream of occasional in-person visits with the adoptive family? These are just a few of the pieces to the adoption plan puzzle, and we can help you put it all together. Most adoptive families today have some form of open adoption plan in place with their child’s birth mother. Studies show that children and birth parents involved in an open adoption are happier than those in closed adoptions. This is because of the peace of mind and knowledge that open contact can bring. However, open adoption may not be right for everyone. At Adoptions With Love, you can choose to make a semi-open or closed adoption plan. No matter what you choose, this plan is completely tailored to your needs and desires. There is no right or wrong choice. Adoptions With Love will guide you through this process and support you without judgment.

Choosing the Family

In addition to making an adoption plan, expectant/birth mothers are also able to choose the adoptive parents for their child. If you would like, Adoptions With Love will help guide you through the selection process, in order to find the best forever family for your baby. We collect personal and background information from each waiting family and we visit each of their homes, so that you can ensure your baby will be placed into a safe and loving home. We also have family photo albums and letters you can look through, to learn about each family. Ultimately, it is all up to you, and you have Adoptions With Love to offer as much information as you need.

Medical Care to Count On

Adoptions With Love will help you find medical care to meet your physical needs (i.e. prenatal care) in addition to your emotional needs. Should you need a doctor or midwife, we will help in finding you the healthcare professional with whom you will be most comfortable. We will also ensure you have access to a full-service hospital or birthing center, with a caring staff to assist in the delivery. Adoptions With Love will also cover any uninsured medical expenses upon completion of your adoption.

Support to Bank On

Facing an unplanned pregnancy can feel overwhelming, not just emotionally, but financially, as well. Adoptions With Love is here to help expectant birth mothers, without the added stress of housing and living expenses. We can cover a security deposit and several months of rent. We can also assist with utility bills, phone bills, maternity clothing, and other maternity-related payments, as necessary, during your pregnancy and weeks after birth.

Legal Logic

Expectant/birth mothers at Adoptions With Love have access to knowledgeable attorneys who specialize in adoption across the United States. No matter where you live, we will help you understand your rights and the laws surrounding adoption in your state. We are here to ensure your rights as a birth mother are respected and acknowledged at all times.

These important services are always free for expectant/birth mothers, and making an adoption plan is always free-of-pressure. Adoptions With Love understands this emotional time is one that requires lots of support and assistance. If you are still wondering, “how much does adoption cost?”, please download our free new eBook, “Adoption FAQ for Expectant/Birth Mothers.”


Compassionate Unplanned Pregnancy Counseling

Facing an unplanned pregnancy can be a scary time in a woman’s life. There are so many emotions and unknowns surrounding the situation. You may also have many concerns and questions about what to do next – What should you do? Who should you tell? Where should you go for support? Despite what you may be feeling now, know that you are not alone. Adoptions With Love is here for you. By asking questions, learning about all your options, and speaking with an experienced, compassionate counselor, you can make a positive, informed decision regarding your unplanned pregnancy.

If you do not feel ready to become a parent, or, perhaps, raise another child, you may be considering the alternative option of adoption. Adoption is a brave and selfless decision made with great care and love. It allows you to provide your baby with a stable home, a forever family, and a life full of opportunity. That is why we often say “making an adoption plan” – because it enables you to thoughtfully plan for your child’s life. Adoption also gives families who cannot have biological children the opportunity to become parents.

As positive as making an adoption can be for you and your child, it can feel like a lonely and overwhelming road at times – even for those with supportive families and loved ones. The caring staff at Adoptions With Love offers an extra shoulder to lean on throughout the journey.

As an expectant mother, you deserve to talk about your options in an open and neutral safe space. That is why Adoptions With Love offers free and judgement-free unplanned pregnancy counseling for women of all ages and backgrounds. No matter your situation, we offer non-biased, pressure-free, and confidential support. We can educate you on all of your options – from parenting to adoption – and help you make the best possible choice for you and your baby. We will support any choice that you make.

Unbiased, educational unplanned pregnancy counseling is a key resource to have as an expectant mother. While you may want to talk to friends or family about your feelings, it is also important to speak with a professional counselor. Pregnancy and adoption counselors are experienced, caring, and specially trained in unplanned pregnancies. They understand what you are going through and what you can do next. Family, friends, and even the biological father, however, may feel inclined to offer their own opinions. It is important to remember that, as an expectant mother, this is your decision. The right people to talk to (and the right counselors to see) are the ones who understand that only you know what is best for you and your baby. You should never feel judged or pressured into a decision.

Unplanned pregnancy counseling should be offered throughout each stage of your pregnancy. If you choose to make an adoption plan with Adoptions With Love, we will also provide you with free counseling services following your baby’s birth and adoption. All counseling offered to expectant/birth mothers is completely confidential.

Even if you have not made a decision, you can always turn to an adoption agency for unplanned pregnancy support. Adoption agencies work with many women in similar situations, and understand all aspects of what you are experiencing. You can see an adoption agency counselor simply to learn more about adoption, discuss all your options and to talk through any feelings you might have. It is important to find a licensed, dependable, full-service adoption agency that works within your state.

For more than 32 years, Adoptions With Love has been helping expectant/birth mothers make positive plans for their babies. We are a licensed, full-service, non-profit adoption agency that understands all the emotions and decisions that unplanned pregnancy can bring. With open minds and open hearts, our trained counselors will speak with you and educate you on your many options. In addition to options counseling, we also have access to attorneys who specialize in adoption. Should you decide to move forward with an adoption plan, we will help handle all legal and financial aspects of the adoption, including termination of parental rights for the birth father. We can also help you find quality, medical care.

Our counseling services for expectant/birth mothers are always free of charge. A woman facing unplanned pregnancy has enough on her mind. Paying for a counseling service should not be an added stressor. Know that we are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to help you through this journey. Simply call us toll-free at 800-722-7731 or text us confidentially at 617-777-0072. You may also contact us here or visit us online for more information regarding our free birth mother services.


State by State: How to Place Your Baby for Adoption in Colorado

Are you facing an unplanned pregnancy? One of the most important things to know as an expectant parent in Colorado is that you have options. No matter the circumstance, Adoptions With Love wants you to know that you do not have to make this decision alone. For more than 30 years, we have been matching expectant and birth parents with loving and devoted adoptive families. Our licensed, private adoption agency specializes in providing adoption services throughout the state of Colorado. If you are pregnant and hoping to learn more about adoption, we can help. Our caring staff is here to help you research your options, educate you about adoption in Colorado, and help you make the best possible decision for you and your baby – free-of-pressure and free-of-cost. We are available 24/7 to give you confidential and compassionate support, throughout your pregnancy and beyond.

To help get you started, Adoptions With Love has created this short guide to show you some of the steps you can take if you decide to make an adoption plan in Colorado:

  1. Choose an adoption agency.

As you begin to explore your options and make an adoption plan, your first step will be to choose the right adoption agency. There are countless adoption professionals to choose from, but it is important to find someone you feel completely comfortable with – professionals you can trust. We recommend choosing an adoption agency that is fully willing to discuss your options, listen to your hopes and needs, and respect any choice that you make. Your adoption agency should also know and inform you on adoption laws in Colorado and provide you the guidance you need and deserve.

  1. Meet with an adoption counselor.

After choosing an adoption agency that works in Colorado, you should begin meeting with a licensed adoption social worker. At Adoptions With Love, we believe this is an essential part of the journey. This is the person who will walk you through your pregnancy and adoption options, and who help you make an adoption plan that is unique to you. She will also be there to answer your questions, to answer the phone whenever you call, and to help you navigate any emotions along the way. At Adoptions With Love, we believe an informed decision is the best decision, and that you should be given the opportunity to consider your options, learn about your birth mother rights, and understand exactly what to expect before, during, and after the adoption process. Only then will you know if adoption is right for you.

  1. Understand the adoption laws in Colorado.

Adoption laws vary by state. In Colorado, no parent can sign any legal adoption documents until after the baby is born. This gives birth mothers a chance to meet their baby and additional time to think about their choice. At Adoptions With Love, we encourage you to take this time to ensure you are comfortable with your decision.

There are many other laws about financial aid you may receive, your rights as an expectant parent, as well as the rights of your baby’s biological father. That is why, if you choose to make an adoption plan in Colorado, it is important to work with an agency that is experienced in the state. Adoptions With Love, for example, works with knowledgeable adoption attorneys who are specifically trained in Colorado adoptions.  We can meet with you – wherever you are – to help walk you through the legal process. Rest assured that our legal services, along with other birth parent services, are free of charge.

  1. Choose an adoptive family.

At Adoptions With Love, you will have the opportunity to choose the perfect adoptive family for your baby. Your adoption counselor will listen to your wishes and vision for the ideal family, and send you detailed profiles and photo albums from the many families hoping to adopt. Once you have chosen the right family, you will have the option to meet or speak with them – over the phone, email, or in-person – if you would like. This is completely up to you! No matter which family you choose, you can rest assured your baby will be welcomed into a safe, secure, and loving home. All families at Adoptions With Love undergo a thorough screening process, which includes background checks, interviews, and a series of in-person visits to ensure the safety and stability of their home.

  1. Make a post-placement plan.

At Adoptions With Love, expectant/birth parents can choose to keep in touch with their child’s adoptive family even after the adoption takes place. This is available through an open adoption plan. Open adoption means birth parents and adoptive parents stay in contact over the years. This level of contact, as well as the frequency contact, is defined by you. You may also decide you do not want contact right away, and opt for a closed adoption plan. You can always open this up down the road, with the help of your adoption counselor. All of the families at Adoptions With Love have agreed to at least a semi-open adoption, meaning we will have letters and photos of your child if and when you are ready.

Whether you choose an open adoption, semi-adoption, or closed adoption, our trained social workers will always be here for you, now and for years to come. Adoption is a lifelong journey. After placing your baby for adoption in Colorado, we encourage you to pursue counseling and support. Adoptions With Love offers ongoing, confidential counseling services at no cost to birth parents who chose adoption. We can help you navigate your emotions, as well as any post-placement communication and relationships.

Whether you just found out you are pregnant, are in your final trimester, or have already given birth to your baby, it is not too late to start an adoption plan. Contact Amy, Nancy, Nellie, Claudia, or Amelia today at 1-800-722-7731 for more information on adoption in Colorado.

This is our State by State Adoption blog series. To learn about the different areas we service, or to find the specific steps of adoption in your state, please visit: adoptionswithlove.org/areas-we-service.

 


The All-Around Benefits of an Open Adoption

An unplanned pregnancy can stir many emotions for expectant/birth mothers: feelings of love, fear, grief, and hope are all common. It also comes with many life-changing choices. When it comes to making an adoption plan, for example, there are several decisions to be made. Second to choosing an adoptive family for your baby, you must decide whether you would like an open, semi-open, or closed adoption.

Many expectant/birth mothers today find peace of mind in making an open adoption plan for their baby. Open adoption allows them to stay in touch with their child and his or her family over the years. It also gives adoptive families and children the chance to ask any questions that arise along the way.

That is why today, most private, domestic adoptions are open in some form. In nine out of 10 infant adoptions, for example, the adoptive and expectant/birth parents meet each other. 68 percent of privately adopted children have had some contact with their birth families after the adoption took place.

There are many benefits of open adoption. Research shows that open adoption is generally positive for everyone involved: the expectant/birth parents, the child, and his or her adoptive parents. According to Adoptions With Love’s open adoption infographic, children are most satisfied in fully open adoptions, where they know their birth families.

While there are many benefits of open adoption, it may not be right for everyone. Before making this important decision, Adoptions With Love wants you to understand all of your adoption options and feel comfortable with any choice you make. Let us explore the many benefits of open adoption for those interested in making an adoption plan.

Benefits of Open Adoption for the Child

Each year, there are 14,000 domestic adoptions in the U.S. An estimated 62 percent of those adopted children are lovingly placed with a family as newborns.

With so much happening physically and emotionally during pregnancy, it can be difficult for many expectant/birth mothers to imagine the benefits of adoption for their baby. It can be comforting to know that an open adoption is often the best choice for a child.

Ninety percent of adopted children over age five have positive or mostly positive feelings about their adoption. Adopted children who meet in person with their birth mothers have been found to express the highest levels of satisfaction when compared to those who never met or eventually stopped contact. Over 80 percent of adopted children have a warm and close relationship with their adoptive parents.

In open arrangements, children often know more about their adoption stories: who they are, where they came from, what their birth parents look like, why their birth parents made this choice. They are comforted in having this access and this information, and usually have less problems and “missing pieces” as they grow. Adopted children in an open adoption have a better understanding of their:

  • Self and Identity
  • Family History
  • Genealogy
  • Birth mother’s choice – In an open adoption, children hold some empathy for their birth mother, who they know made a courageous and selfless decision to give them a better life

Adopted children can also enjoy a wider circle of support with an open adoption. They have a well-established relationship and bond with their adoptive parents, who raise and love them wholeheartedly. They also understand their roots and background, knowing they are loved by both families.

Benefits of Open Adoption for You

An obvious benefit of open adoption is having the option to select an adoptive family for your baby and get to know them. This choice often brings peace of mind for expectant/birth mothers who can rest assured they hand-picked a loving, stable, devoted family for their baby. You can get to know hopeful adoptive families by looking at their adoptive family profile, which Adoptions With Love can share with you if you are ready to make this choice.

The continued, post-adoption contact with adoptive families is another great benefit of open adoption. Birth mothers can get updates and be reassured that her child is doing well and is happy with his or her adoptive family.

The chance to talk about your adoption story with your child is another benefit of a fully open adoption. If and when your child asks questions such as, “What is my biological father like?” or “Why was I placed for adoption?” you will have the opportunity to share and explain from the heart. You can know that your child will learn about his/her adoption story and understand that the choice was made with love.

Open adoption can take on different meanings to different people. Some expectant/birth parents consider contact with the adoptive family before birth to be the main component of openness. Others believe open adoption includes contact before and after the adoption takes place. Ongoing, post-adoption contact can consist of a range of contact, such as email updates, phone conversations, or even in-person visits, depending on the birth mother’s comfort level.

As an open adoption agency, every prospective adoptive family at Adoptions With Love agrees to a semi-open adoption, and most families are now open to some direct, ongoing communication with the birth parents over the years. We want to help you make an adoption plan that works best for you – and help you feel confident and happy with your loving decision. We understand that making an adoption plan is a big decision, and we have caring social workers who can help with all your questions and concerns.

To learn more about the benefits of open adoption, call Adoptions With Love at 1-800-722-7731 or text us confidentially at 1-617-777-0072.  We are available around the clock to answer your questions. If you would like more information about open adoption, please download our free Guide to Open Adoption.